Happy retirement humor.

Gene Perret. Retirement: That’s when you return from work one day and say, “Hi, Honey, I”m home – forever.”. Gene Perret. You know it’s time to retire when the guys ask you if you’re “getting any,” you think it means sleep. Greg Tamblyn. You gain two new best friends upon your retirement.Jan 24, 2024 · Good luck getting up! “Retired life motto: If not now, then after the next nap.”. “You know you’re retired when happy hour is a nap.”. Retirement is the only time when you can have your cake and eat it too, every day. “Retirement’s great – I get my pension in pajamas!”. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Retiring Weekly Schedule Custom Mug, Retirement Gifts for Women, Funny Retirement Gift for Woman, Happy Retirement, Woman's Retirement Gift (9.6k) Sale Price $13.99 $ 13.99 $ 27.98 Original Price $27.98 (50% off) Add to Favorites Retirement Gifts for Men, Funny Retirement Gifts for Boss, Coworker Retirement, Retired Gift, Personalized Mug ...The Best Wishes and Quotes for a Happy Retirement. Funny and Short Retirement Quotes and Jokes. Inspirational Quotes about Retirement. Retirement Wishes and Messages. Happy Retirement – Farewell Quotes. Humorous Poems and Retirement Messages. Happy Retirement – the Last Working Day is Approaching. Saying Goodbye …

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Below are 10 inspirational retirement quotes that may give a friend, or yourself, optimism and excitement beginning a new chapter in life: “Often when you think you’re at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.” ~ Fred Rogers. “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” ~ C. S. Lewis.

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For the perks. “I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.” —Bob Hope. While the rest of the world has to rise when their alarm clock sounds, new ...

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Jump To a Section Below [ hide] Retirement Wishes by Theme. Emotional Retirement Messages. Funny Retirement Messages. Inspirational Retirement Messages. Witty and …Sep 14, 2022 · 24 Funny and Inspirational Retirement Quotes. 1. “My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that’s the law.”. – Jerry Seinfeld. 2. Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. – Jonathan Clements. Jan 22, 2024 · Funny Quotes to Say Happy Retirement From funny retirement one-liners to humorous quotes designed to elicit laughter, finding the perfect words to celebrate a retiree is an art. Whether it’s a farewell email, a heartfelt toast, or a thoughtful gift, funny retirement quotes can add a touch of humor to the occasion, making it truly memorable. To master the art of “book” humor! Retirement: where you can dance like nobody’s watching – because nobody is! My retired uncle has a new profession – he’s a “snoozerhero”! ... Happy retirement and happy punning! Categories Puns. 109+ Best Relationship Puns for Happy Couples. 113+ Romantic Puns to Melt Hearts and ... Quotes about retirement planning; Funny Retirement Quotes. The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Abe Lemons. 65 tips for a healthy, wealthy and happy retirement. Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did. Robert Benchley. Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had ...

Our funny retirement cakes feature personalized, humorous messages like “Unemployed and Loving It” or “Goodbye Tension, Hello Pension.”. These cakes are perfect for conveying the joy of escaping long commutes and early mornings while adding a lighthearted touch to the celebration.Retirement one liners. Grandma's been staring through the window ever since it started to snow. If it gets any worse I'll have to let her in. One liner tags: puns, retirement, winter. 92.46 % / 1759 votes. share. Retirement is the time in your life when time is no longer money. One liner tags: money, retirement, time. 80.61 % / 411 votes.Retirement doesn't have to be all serious and sentimental - inject some fun and laughter into your send-off with Greeting Birds' collection of funny retirement wishes! Our hilarious messages are sure to bring a smile to your colleague's face as they embark on their next adventure. Browse our blog now and find the perfect message to make their retirement …There are plenty of retirement songs out there that can fit any theme – from happy farewell songs to funny retirement song parodies. Modern retirement songs are also available if you want something more contemporary. Whatever your preference may be, selecting the right tunes will help create unforgettable memories at your retirement …There are many positive sayings to write on a retirement cake, such as “Congratulations on your retirement,” “We’ll miss you, Happy Retirement” or “Have a blast on your retirement!...Congratulations on your retirement. With a whole world of free time, now is the time to revisit your bucket list. You are one of the best colleagues I have worked with. How I wish I could still hold on to you. Happy retirement. Today you leave the office for a relaxing time with your family.

13. Short Retirement Quotes. Here are quotes that are short and sweet—ideal for texting and eliciting a chuckle or two from your retired friend or family member. “Retirement: Enjoy every day.”. “Retirement is not the end, it’s a new beginning.”. “The best is yet to come.”. “Life begins at retirement.”.

Zonon 2 Pcs Retirement Card Greeting Retirement Card American Funny Retirement Card for Coworker Colleague Friend Humor Retiring Card Gift for Men Women. 98. 50+ bought in past month. $599 ($3.00/Count) FREE delivery Thu, Apr 25 on $35 of items shipped by Amazon. Or fastest delivery Wed, Apr 24. For the perks. “I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.” —Bob Hope. While the rest of the world has to rise when their alarm clock sounds, new ...Feb 25, 2023 - Wish a friend or colleague a happy retirement with one of these funny retirement messages and enjoy a laugh with them as they head off into the sunsetInspirational Retirement One Liners. 29. Retirement is the only time in life when time no longer equals money. 30. Retire from your job, but never retire your mind. 31. Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.Apr 23, 2021 · If you are searching for “funny retirement quotes“, this list is for you! Use these famous quotes to send a boss, co-worker or teacher off to a happy and healthy retirement. Funny Quotes About Retirement “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” – Mark Twain “Retirement: no job, no stress, no ... Good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favor!”. “Honey, retirement is the perfect time to discover your true calling: becoming a professional nap-taker and a master of snoring harmony. I have no doubt you’ll excel!”. “As you retire, my love, let’s remember the golden rule of marriage: ‘Happy wife, happy life.’.Good luck getting up! “Retired life motto: If not now, then after the next nap.”. “You know you’re retired when happy hour is a nap.”. Retirement is the only time when you can have your cake and eat it too, every day. “Retirement’s great – I get my pension in pajamas!”.Fucking Quitter Happy Retirement Shirt, Funny Retirement Shirt, Sarcastic Retirement Gift, Gift for Retired, Happy Retirement Tee (22.3k) Sale Price $10.60 $ 10.60 $ 21.21 Original Price $21.21 (50% off) Add to Favorites Funny Pickleball Retirement Card - Now You Can Play All The Pickleball You Want ...Barry Wilkin. Retirement is wonderful. It’s doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it. Gene Perret. He had an answer to almost everything and he …

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Dec 5, 2019 - Explore Matt Kinsey's board "Retirement jokes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about retirement, retirement jokes, retirement quotes.Retirement one liners. Grandma's been staring through the window ever since it started to snow. If it gets any worse I'll have to let her in. One liner tags: puns, retirement, winter. 92.46 % / 1759 votes. share. Retirement is the time in your life when time is no longer money. One liner tags: money, retirement, time. 80.61 % / 411 votes.Find amazing deals on 1pc funny happy retirement card congratulation retirement for him her retired card for coworker on Temu. Shop on Temu to start saving.Talking Lady Spaniel in Paris (Personalize) 1. Send a hearty congratulations for a job well done. Give congratulations in a Retirement ecard to someone who deserves a congrats online greeting for a job well done. We have free funny retirement ecards that are ideal to send someone entering their golden time knowing you appreciate them.The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I ache all over. Everywhere I touch it hurts.”. The doctor replies, “OK. Touch your elbow.”. The guy touches his elbow and winces in ...Whether you’re a father looking to entertain your kids or simply someone who appreciates a good laugh, mastering the art of humor is an invaluable skill. One particular genre that ...Incorporating humor into your happy retirement message is among the creative employee appreciation ideas you can use. Your colleague is about to embark on a new chapter of their life. The excitement that comes with this next stage may be accompanied by anxiety. As a result, a funny retirement message may help ease their …Funny Retirement Quotes. The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. ~ Abe Lemons. The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. ~ Author Unknown. You have to put off being young until you can retire. ~ Author Unknown. A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job. COVER - Happy Retirement - I've been asked to say a few words about my time at this company. Swear Jar ; CARD SIZE - Receive 1, regular sized notecard with 5x7 Inch envelope. We offer funny cards that come either blank or greeted inside, so be sure to review all product photos before purchasing. USE - The perfect, Humorous card for writing ... The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I ache all over. Everywhere I touch it hurts.”. The doctor replies, “OK. Touch your elbow.”. The guy touches his elbow and winces in ...Best wishes on your well-deserved retirement. Wishing you a fun-filled retirement! May God bless you with a fantastic retirement. Enjoy your freedom. Best wishes for your retirement. You deserve all the best things in your retired life. Wishing you all the best in your future endeavors.

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